All Before Ten..AM!

OK! All I wanted was another 30 minutes of sleep!

Let's see...this is a picture of what's left of my Skinny Cow ice-cream! Alexa and Morgan took random bites of all four! They left the tray in the freezer...I suppose the leftovers are for me! No....they are not organic, there isn't anything organic about a skinny cow! lol!















They ate it like rats! Really, look at them! And they said they couldn't open the fridge when they were hungry and I said, "go get an apple!"













It gets better....they also helped themselves to my lipstick!! Thanks Becky, I appreciate the ALL DAY or even better ALL YEAR wearing lipstick!










And it lasted and lasted, ....it took me 45 minutes to get some of it off! The rest, well they had to go to school with it! I'd tell you the brand but they hid the bottle from me!


Needless to say, we were late to school and I arrived with no lunch because I thought the note said, "Pizza Day," although I read Tuesday, May 20th, I thought...what a relief!! Problem was it was only May 13th!! ...Ms. Gina found them Ramen Noodles in the school kitchen! Now my kids want to know why they can't have more of them! ....Yes, all before 10:00 AM!

Yes, Mike was out of town again!

Could It Be Another Detour In Tennessee?

March 2008: Going to dinner with hair!! Yahooo!



October 2007..smilin'






Christmas 2007.still smilin'




November 2007...yet another smile!







Thursday, May 1st....


Cancer won't take that smile from me!!

... Well, as long as you guys keep praying for me and God stays by my side!


As most of you know, in all the fun...there's been a lot of sickness.

I often try to carry on as if things are going well but I have a lot of ugly symptoms. My head hurts, often feeling like pressure surrounds every pumping vein in it! My bones ache and at times have excruciating pain. I frequently vomit but with no pattern. I’m real tired, often turning in after the girls go to sleep or at least in bed. My brain isn’t functioning like it used to or even close. Confused, forgetful.

So, I head back to the doctors office in Memphis. More blood work. Like 8 valves of blood! Another chest scan. More ultrasounds. More speculation.

Then BAM! It’s like September 2007 all over again!

“There’s a good chance the cancer has spread but we can’t know for sure until we run more tests.”


This time, no stinky feet! haha! No kids! Just a view of the golf course and Eva...

Off I went with doctors orders for more tests. A bone scan. An echo. A CT scan. A PET CT scan. Physical Therapy. And the rest of the day to act normal, have no worries. Pick up my kids from school. Make dinner. Climb in bed alone, Mike at a business dinner, thinking about the “unknown” again. Thinking about the “extra” time I’ve already been given. Thinking about the fight I thought we were winning, God and I on one team and cancer the other. Thinking about all of you, may God bless you for blessing me with your prayers, your words, your generosity, your meals, your time with my kids.

I know Mike’s going to be bummed! He’s really been relieved he didn’t have to give me that leg after all! Lol! And the kids! I remember when I returned home, Alexa, Elena and Morgan had a hard time sleeping. Often waking in the night. I would tuck them back in their beds or at times, let them climb in our bed. Fast asleep, I covered them with kisses. One morning I asked Alexa, “Why did you come in mommy’s room last night?” Alexa said, “I want to see if you still there mommy.” She broke my heart. My girls unsure if I would be there when they woke.

It’s been challenging to say the least. Taking care of a family while feeling so sick. I often lose my patience, feeling short of breath, frustrated with my abilities. Often mad at myself for forgetting things or letting the girls down when I’m exhausted and have to rest. But in all this, I keep going, working out, Saturday nights spent with friends (East TN, blame Alisa & James for the lack of blogs!lol!), I know I am beating cancer and cancer can’t kick my butt nor take my smile. I truly feel this. I feel everything will get better, I will be given another chance.

So I lay here tonight, alone, praying to God…asking he help me live a cancer free life. To help me live a healthier life. To help me with my girls and give me the strength and energy to fight to live a “normal” life with rosy sunglasses, without sickness. (Something I didn't ask the first time, guess I'm getting greedy!haha) Most of all, I ask God to guide me to live a life with greater faith that allows me to let go of any fears.

I ask you, to continue to pray for me and my family. To live today like there’s no tomorrow. To truly understand, life is a gift, cancer or no cancer!

I've increased my workouts to two hours of serious fitness while I wait for the results. Let's support each other, you do the same! If you workout, duoble the time one day, if you don't, do it one day. A walk, run, weights...whatever! Think of me, recovering from leg surgery, dealing with chemo side effects and the unknown again in my life. If I can do it, you can too! The start of our "Race for Sarcoma!" Every person who writes a comment to this blog that they did some fitness as a result of the blog, Mike (he doesn't know yet, lol!) and I will donate $2.00 to Univ Of Michigan's Sarcoma research! (You have to start somewhere!) You don't need a log in to comment, "anonymous" works without but write your first name at the end of your comment!!

My tests are scheduled on May 6th and 7th. I hope to have the results the following week! I will live the next week without fear, trusting in my faith.

Eva's World!

The school bus and school house I made for "Teacher Appreciation" gifts! Each kids pic is in the "window"...I started with a box, no wonder I still owe "thank yous!" haha



My "saucy" girls. Yes, they are still toddlers!














Ok, I think Ms. Shannon said it best, “You just need this dark cloud moved from above you.” That I do!

Since my last blog… Mike started traveling again! That was the good news! Haha, just kidding Mike!

As for the rest,… Alexa almost drowned at swim lessons and I, well I ran to the edge of the pool yelling “Mike!” Hmm, Mike was at work and no, the coach’s name was not “Mike!” She was ok after he pulled her out choking up water! ((That vision, eyes wide open looking up at you, bubbles surfacing the water, hair floating aimlessly… stayed with me for nights!!,) Then… Alexa, yes the same daughter that got lost, pinned her leg between the chair and the tile and almost drowned, almost choked to death. Me, again…brain dead…didn’t know what to do for her ( I do keep choking instructions in my laundry room but I wasn’t home) as I stuck my fingers down her throat trying to pull a slice of orange out, again yelling for, no not Mike, rather help!…I was grateful it slid down her throat!

It doesn’t stop there!! Morgan decided to push the “automatic” sliding door at Dillards and her hand got caught between the glass window and door!! At this point I was more concerned about having to tell Mike we were shopping, again!!! Needless to say, we sat at Dillards with ice packs and had to fill out an incident report. Nice!! Is this really what it’s like living with three toddlers!!?

The past few weeks, I’ve been trying to make up lost time at the schools. I spoke about our Mexican heritage at Elena’s last week. Elena and I shopped for Mexican candy and made treat bags, we put together a few poster boards with facts and had all the girls doing the Mexican hat dance at school! I was also able to squeeze in a lunch during “Teacher Appreciation” week and we made a school house and school bus box for the teacher’s to receive their gifts. They were so cute, I must say!! Haha! Elena and I did most of the work, Alexa and Morgan…well they were there to let me know what parts of the bus I forgot, like the door…so there I was, wee hours of the morning…adding a door!! So much fun!

I’ve been working out, a lot! You say, don't worry...must, I gained 20ish pounds from chemo! But I’ve lost weight, A LITTLE! Like 5 pounds! Then I gained it back! Ooops!

The first week I returned home, I scouted out gyms. We found “home” at Prairie Life Fitness. This is like a dream come true! They offer two hours of “Nursery” at no additional charge BUT they do a lot with the kids while they are in there! Crafts, gymnastics (their version), open gym and more. We can be found there many days for many hours...I even get their showers in there! haha! So, here I was, working out two hours every day….one hour Zumba or Pilates, 30 minutes treadmill and 30 minutes elliptical. Now I do all sorts of workouts, it truly makes me feel better as I have been real sick and it sucks! haha!

So back to the doctors office. Say those prayers, I’m just getting my mommy feet wet again!

Love and miss all!!